Not Them Forest…

Updated:

By Pete H

OK folks, here’s your weekend starter for one – and a nice simple one it is, too. Who said: “Getting into League One, I do think will be easy“? If your answer was Forest Green’s meat-free maestro Dale Vince, super smashing great. You now have one! Not sure what you have one of, but that’s no longer our beef (No pun intended? Ed.). This is, to go back to the point, a quote that’s starting to age awkwardly. He ain’t wrong, to be fair, ’bout more promotion places being up for grabs in this division compared to the Conference. There just ain’t 23 of ’em.

We’ll come back to that, however.

For now, let’s talk Tuesday night. If the old adage is right and you are only as good as your last match, our flip-reverse was unlike any other seen since the days of Blazin’ Squad. No, it doesn’t make the bad of last weekend go away all of a sudden. Trust us, that match will be in their End-of-Season doovdé no matter how many times you write to the censor. To beat Accy indoors was no mean feat midweek, and can be our springboard back up the charts. ‘Cos being in seventh position feels like even the table is shitbantering us. 7-Up? Ugh, we ask you…

 

Stevenage v Forest Green Rovers: The Lowdown

Stevenage v Forest Green Rovers? Not them Forest, this Forest...

The Opposition:

Is promotion to the Football League the most historic thing to happen to FGR in 2017? Of course not! And we wouldn’t ask such a leading question if it was. No, that achievement pales into comparison with becoming our joint-fourth most played opponent. Ohhh yes. It’s the 28th meeting of our two sides; drawing them level with Northwich, the Daggers and Yo! Vil. It will be short-lived joy of course, as we take on Yo! Vil next weekend. But, lads, enjoy the occasion. You only play someone for the 28th time once…

It’s also worth noting that we’ve only scored more goals against Morecambe in our history. With 54 goals from 27 previous encounters, that’s a ridonculous average of two goals each time we take to the floor. And how can you be shocked at that when we’ve put four past them on four separate occasions, including the ludicrous time we drew 4-4 at their gaff. Imagine being aghast at conceding a late-minute leveller in that festival of football, having been three down at one point. It was also the fixture that gave rise to the Stimmo Bounce.

 

The Form:

We don’t need to go into our form. You’ll know how we’ve done and not done over the past few weeks. For the Rovers, however, it’s been a hard introduction to life in the League. With just the two wins to their name in the bread and butter this term, they are all but propping up the table. Only Chesterfield are sitting beneath them. Has a corner been turned, though? As we were getting busy rising from the dead (Nice hyperbole. Ed.) indoors against Accrington, so were FGR. In the context of their recent form, a win away to Coventry is pretty decent.

Thanks to kickoff.co.uk, it’s much easier to see how the recent form has been taking shape:

Stevenage v Forest Green Rovers: Stats

Stevenage v Forest Green Rovers: Stats

 

 

The Referee:

This news just in: it’s Lee Collins. Wait, Justin Lee Collins? Remember him?
P6 W2 D1 L3 F12 A13; last result: Stevenage 3-4 Doncaster Rovers, 03/12/2016

 

The Head-to-Head:

P27 W13 D10 L4 F54 A36; last result: Stevenage 2-0 Forest Green Rovers, 10/04/2010

 

So, in conclusion. This is a game that promises to have it all; a veritable classic as 28th meetings go. First, we’ve the return of two Larry Ledgepants in the incredibly attractive shape and form of Scott ‘Lairdy’ Laird and Mark ‘Robbo’ Roberts. Next, we have appearances to be kept with our two-goal-a-game average versus Forest Green Rovers. Then, if that wasn’t enough, our scoring average when this referee is (weirdly) involved is two goals per game too. Oh lordy, won’t you buy us a Mercedes-Benz. It’s going to be some afternoon…

 

• BoroGuide’s Forest Green Rovers club profile – there’s no meat or dairy in it, we promise…