The Monday Rant: First Half

By BoroGuide

Image: Jonas B/flickr

Do you remember the last time we scored a goal in the first half of a game? And don’t say Sheffield Wednesday, because that doesn’t really count. Not when the ball hit Scott Laird and went in, rather than the other way around. In a world of great expectations, we could be a little arsey about this.

But ild speculation and panic never solved a crisis. But it’s not our responsibility to solve it and it’s a nice day for a bit of over-indulgence. All we want is a goal in the first half for a change. Roll out the clichés about getting on the front foot – that ought to do it. Ossie Ardilles’ five-man attack was tremendously under-rated too. Now David Bowie’s Heroes is circulating in the mind. We’re thinking too much ‘ere.

We’ve been charitable of late, allowing teams to lead and the like. It’s a hallmark of a team so secure in recent success and those still to come that we toy with teams. “Have a goal, we say. Go on, have another” … not our problem if we’re still coming away with a point. But it is time to end this charity. Roll up the sleeves and bang on, because it is definitely in there somewhere, dontcha think?

We, here in our wonderful penthouse overlooking the Thames avec cider in hand, believe that someone is about to be tonked by the G-Smiffy All Stars. Craig Reid will have a couple of them to himself; one will go in off Agyemang’s arse (they all count); Ronnie Henry, with no doubt whatsoever to our minds, is due a goal; and Chris Day will double his career tally – it’s OK Grant Basey, we know it wasn’t an own goal…

So. Fancy your chances Bournemouth?

Walsall Ratings. Part of your five-a-day… and yes, we appreciate it wasn’t quite a “rant”.

Day 7 – Left his go-go-gadget-extendy-arms at home and had no chance with the Walsall opener
Henry 6 – Little opportunity to get forward and subdued by his normal standards. Booked. Subbed.
Ashton 6 – Runs a part-time demolition company. He looks at the walls and they come a-tumbling
King Robbo 7 – Mark Roberts is Why We Bother
Darius 6 – He’s had better games
Wilson 7 – The Batman scene from Only Fools… reminds us of Ronnie/Lawrie down the right
The Essential Byrom 7 – His passing ability could soothe
Bossie 8 – If we could finish like that, we wouldn’t be sitting here doing this
Lairdy 6 – Dude looks like a Lairdy…
Patrick 6 – Flashes. Glimpses. But not a lot else.
Reid 7 – We like him. He’ll get the ball, locate the goal and then try and merge the two.
JMW 7 – Hugs the line like an affectionate labrador and that is what you want from a winger
Stacey 6 – Stacy Long. He really does “got it going on”
Freeman 6 – Not enough time to make enough impact but on the way to being back to his best